The Weekend

So it's been a hard decision to write about what went on at the weekend but sod it I'll put it down to archive and remind me why I'm doing what I'm doing in some way. I won't advertise this on G+ like usual but it will be here for people to read.

It was the 40th birthday of a good friend so lots of people were going to be there and as it was in a social club the booze was going to be pretty well priced. I took the decision to drive as I am basically not drinking alcohol as part of my fitness regime. I am not opposed to it but I have no intention of putting away 10 beers and a few shots like I used to on a night out and undoing all the hard work I've put in, and it has been hard. I fear so much that given the opportunity I will go off the rails and that will be that for another few months, year, whatever.

I'm not sure if people see me as an easy target because I'd rather keep a friend than lose one which gives me a smile on my face and a gaping hole inside sometimes. Here I am, a designated driver for the night, trying to get fit and lead a healthier lifestyle and I get belittled about it by who I consider friends and even those I barely even know. I am pleased to write that the majority of those there were fine and gave me no grief whatsoever, I didn't have to bring it up and they never brought it up. Unfortunately here are just a few quotes from 3 different people:

"Do you want a drink, even a lemonade as I know you are driving so I won't take the piss"

"There's loads of sandwiches left, don't worry Tone will have some"

To my stating that no thanks, I've eaten this evening already and am in training someone else exlaims "In training! Then use both hands!" while gesturing stuffing imaginary sandwiches into their mouth.

Now is that supportive, friendly? I felt pretty angry on the inside and heavens help me because I hadn't had a drink I remained placid and stayed until the end of the night and even dropped the birthday girl and others back to the after party, which I did not stay for. I guess the fact that it irked me says a lot about how important this is to me.

I was approached later in the evening by one of the people from the above quotes and he maybe had reached the emotional stage of drinking. He is someone I want to know and like but it appears he had an unfair advantage over me. He started being very supportive and at the same time oddly un-supportive. I get where he is coming from though and I know it is all said in humour and maybe he is trying a little hard to befriend me. I think I'd better tell him he's ok with me and once I have a, as in one, beer with him we'll be ok and I can go back to being good to myself.

As I wanted to make clear earlier, I fought with myself about posting this but I just want any readers to know, especially any that know me, that I am only doing this for my own good. It is not a slight towards you personally. If you feel that I need to get drunk with you to be friends then I think there may be a question mark over that friendship. Let me state that having a drink with someone is not the same as getting drunk. A beer in good company is awesome, that was proven the day after at a mates BBQ.

It was pretty intimate in the end, only 4 of us in the garden with a BBQ that my mate worked very hard on getting ready. I had 1 beer and really only because my friend brought some with her and I wanted to try it! The band Iron Maiden's Trooper Ale by Robinsons, but I drank about 5 litres of water during the healthy meal and conversation. Everyone got on and caught up with what's happening in life.

Now that I've hopefully got the demons out of my head on this subject I hope it will help me deal with the upcoming nights out. Maybe when people start to see progress they will understand what a nightmare it's been for me to totally change my lifestyle to literally revolve around being healthy and striving to get fit. I'm fucking 24 stone guys, give me a break. If you want the party to continue let me do this, otherwise I fear it will end too soon! Yeah those are watery eyes :/